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Seeking advice is awesome. Listening to motivational talks is superb. Getting a counselor is wonderful, but listening to your inner self is the best. Any load, be it marriage, business, job, health that is causing you setback needs to be pushed aside. If that load swallows you, you will not get to your destination.

Many times, all you need is……you,not anyone. No matter how much help you seek, advice you get, if your mind is not yet prepared to act, you’ll remain same place. Put yourself together and do the needful. What we fail to understand is that the answers we seek most times lie with us. Move, you can do this. Start to take charge of your life, your decisions, your actions and mostly your future. Do not let anyone run you down.

Are you still waiting on promises, on miracles or are you going to get up now?

Written by: Eby Asogwa

Black PowerHands got sore from the burn of the hot coals. It sends a sharp stimulus to the brain; the body withdraws and never wants to give a try any more. The burning passion to still make it work and live my dream wouldn’t let me rest. My mind gets tortured of wanting to try again. I keep on getting burnt but had no peace in me to give up. I took a deep breath, take few steps back and kept watch. I couldn’t still see a thing. I sat down, filled with fury. There’s no me without living real me. There must be a way out. I was filled with sorrow. My heart was heavy. The burden on my shoulder is weighing me down. I stretched my hand but no one, no one to take it. No one to stand with me till the end of time. What a mystery! Mystery of being seen as an object than the subject of transformation”. I closed my eyes, but it was filled with reflection of betrayal, disappointments, pains, deceits, failures, torture, neglects….. Setbacks. Yea….I couldn’t contain it; with a loud scream I opened my eyes. My lips trembling and my hands shaking. Then there’s this sweet voice, calm and it whispers. …

No regrets.   No regrets… you never failed. Where you are is far! Far! Better than where you’re coming from. You already have direction; you’re on the right path. Where you’re going will be far better than where you’re coming from. You’re in charge. Only you have the power to make it happen. …. Make it happen… make it happen!

This sounds also like a mystery. I have tried, and tried, and tried… still trying. I hardly move a feet. I’ve crawled. I still fail. Still pondering on this” There came a sharp flash light on my face, almost setting me blind. I covered my face with my burnt palms. They still hurt.

I can’t do this any more! Free me! I screamed

Free yourself! This voice whispered silently. You’ve come a long way to give up. It’s in your hands to make it work. Stop depending on anyone. Even your shadow leaves you in the dark. Learn to push without look back. If you keep counting your steps you might not get to your destination.

Life is a journey; there must be bus stops, road blocks, road bumps, car break down, tire burst, many times accidents. You’re a survivor! Even while drowning, keep your head above the water level…

My energy begin to fill me as I hear these words, I feel the cracking of my broken bones, I can hear its sounds, I pulled myself up and stood on my feet, I forgot the pains from the my burnt palms. I screamed so loud… I AM A SURVIVOR!

I bent once more and pulled the heavy burning coal, away to make a pass to my tilling. I tilled the ground so fast and energetically, I took my mind away from the pains and focused on my mission. I worked tirelessly. Lo and behold, there lies the gold I’ve been searching for, behind it laid the emerald, the precious stone. I picked up and laughed out loud, with tingly tears at the corner of my eyes. I cling it tight on myself and shed tears amidst laughter. Tears of victory and accomplishment”

I heard claps and shouts of victory behind me, surprisingly I turned to the back, and I can’t believe the people amongst the crowd cheering me up. Exactly the ones that tried to make my journey unsuccessful and told me I can’t make it. Ones who abandoned me when it seems to them I’m a liability and of no value” People who took advantage of my situation”

Ignore them and walk away’ this strange voice said.

Exactly! I replied.

I walked to them with a squeezed face, zero smiles. Pride” They were filled with shame and put their head down, scared of what might befall them. Their faces masked with guilt of their actions towards me. I halted before them, examine these faces and I threw my hands open and let them fill it. I burst into laughter and hugged them. I was so happy they came around.  They were noise once again. I received praises and prayers.

I thanked them whole heartedly. They are the reason why I am me today. If a seed doesn’t die, it can never bear forth fruit. No pain no gain. If you never lacked something, you’ll never appreciate it. It’s through the pains of labor, that an offspring comes forth. I wouldn’t have been me without critics. I wouldn’t have learnt to walk alone if I was not abandoned on the way. I wouldn’t have recognized victory without failure.

Though toucheth my heart, and filled with inspirations.

Thou guideth my path and led me to my destination

Though speaketh to me in dreams, and filled my ears with words to unleash

Though toucheth my hand and blessed thee, and it was used tactfully and technically, and through it messages was passed

Let thou keep directing me for thy journey is still far!

You can be a survivor, only if though listens to thy God inside of you and not men around you

Eby Asogwa.

(WTF)

Women are an important element of the Society. The modern society has started recognizing the individual identity of women. Women should have her aspiration, abilities and qualities as a man does have and should have the opportunities to develop her faculties and to express them according to her own choice. Women can help the society in various ways. They can engage in social activities and work for the betterment of the society..Young educated girls can get engaged in a profession of her choice. We need more doctors, engineers, lawmakers, social workers, software developers etc. Africa cannot grow at good pace unless women come forward and take initiative for the development works. Women’s interest and participation in social life is increasing all over the world. This development is also the result of women’s education and secularization of social values. Women are participating in social organizations and are developing taste for leading a life of social involvement. You are more than what you think you are.

written by Lioness Ngozi Madu.



WHAT IS PROVERB:Proverb is a simple & concrete saying,popularly known & repeated,that expresses truth based on common sense or the practical experiences of humanity.The are often Metaphorical & it’s taken from a Latin word called “PROVERBIUM”.
Proverbs are infinitely more numerous than the Myths we spoke about in our last talk. Proverbs can be found in hundreds & thousands in every African tribes.The address themselves to themes and area of life & knowledge. Proverbs are very concentrated  in the sense that they put a lot of thoughts,ideas,reflections,experiences,observations,knowledge & even world views into a few words. Shortly i shall be saying few proverbs & also try to capture what they intend to mean in a few words. It has been noted that women are extremely valuable in the sight of the society. Not only do we bear life,but we also nurse them,cherish them,give warmeth & care for life since all human life passes through our body. Now i will give us some proverbs to put more light on what am trying to say.
“Wives & Oxen have no friends”, What does this mean or indicates: It indicates that a wife is so valuable & that she can not be given over to even the best friends of her husband. For that reason,another proverbs remainds us that”A woman must not be killed”. My question now is,why that proverb?If a man & children can be killed,why not a woman? the reason why that proverb was said is because women are mothers of life & to kill women is like killing hundreds of children & humanity itself. Women should be handled with respect & not be treated as if they are slaves. The next proverb has to do with the man(Husband)which says & I quote”Did you buy me with elephant tusks? this kind of question can only be asked or said when the woman is being ill-treated by her husband.She reminds him that he really can not buy her,and that she is not a commodity for sale like elephant trunks or slaves,and even an old woman is a blessing to a man. And so another proverb says:”it is better to be married to an old lady than to remain unmarried”. This simply means that there are areas of human life which is only the woman can fulfill. The unmarried man is lacking something,as one proverb is explains:”It is at five that man succeeds”,This proverb was said by the Maasi who uses it to explain that a successful life needs “a wife,a cow,a sheep,a goat & a donkey”. This means that even if one is rich,one is not successful as long as one lacks a wife.
The value of the woman begins already when she was born and not when she gets married. So it is stated that”A baby girl means a beautiful cow”. Already at birth,the woman is destined to be married & in traditional African society,this entails a bride-exchange in form of cattle,services,foodstuffs,family ties or other expressions of the married contract. Further more,I will say that the woman will bear children 6 thus enrich her husband & the wider circle of relatives from both side. The Tsongkhapa & Shangana people of South Africa says and I quote”To beat a woman is to begat a man”. This saying carries with it the hope & expectations,that after marriage,the wife will bear both girls & boys. Therefore,the woman that is not married has practically no role in the society & in African traditional world-view. It ia expected n that all women gets married & so comes this proverb that says:”An ugly girl does not become old at home”, which means that the looks of a girl should not stop her from getting married,otherwise this would deny her the role of womanhood.
This thought is bound up with the value of bearing children; Whereas the childless woman goes through  deep sorrows in African  society. So it is said for example:”That the woman who has children does not desert her home”. This means that bearing children gives the woman the security & joy of a family, and also being taken care of in her old age,of being respected by her husband & the wider society.
So “The woman whose sons or children have died is richer than a barren woman”, This means that people will excuse a woman for loosing her child or children through death,but the one who does not bear any,is hardly excused.
Consequently,people says:”A barren wire never gives thanks”, Therefore nothing else is as valuable as children; If a woman has everything else except children,she would have no cause or joy to give thanks. This sentiment is expressed in African society,where the more children one has,the better. No wonder the Ghanaian  says:”A serviceable wife is often blessed with the birth of a tenth child”. Parental blessings often run along the lines of:”May you bear children like the bees!, May you bear children like calabash seeds!”, e,t,c. But today’s economical & educational pressure have forced a change in these sentiments,where parents reel the need to reduce the number of children they can support & educate adequately. Nevertheless,African society is carried away by the proverb which says:”The satiety of a pregnant woman is off-spring” Meaning that Motherhood is a woman’s fulfillment.
The mother or wife is probably the most important member of the family,the center of family hood. So it is said  by The Akamba people of Kenya for example that”He who has never traveled,thinks that his mother is the best cook in the world”. This proverb,while attacking a narrow horizon in life shows how central the person of a mother is. This sentiment was also aired in another proverb from the Gikuyu of Kenya:”The baby that refuses it’s mother’s breast,will never be full,”other people may feed the baby,/child,but their food would never satisfy him as that provided by the mother”. In these proverb,the place of a mother is further indicated by comparing her with other women or wives,whether she is alive or dead. The Easter Africa people,specifically The Swahilis,says categorically that”The step mother is not the real mother”. This sentiment is shared by other people & is expressed in various ways e,g.”Somebody’s mother can never be better than your own mother,no matter how good she may be to you,or”Your step mother is not your mother,or “A sheep does not lament the death of a goat’s kid.” The above proverb came from the Acholi of Uganda. The South Africans have this proverb that says”The mother’s breast can not get Leprosy”. All these & many more proverbs are indicating that mother’s role can never be 100% duplicated: She provides the best love tenderness,warmeth,care,bodily & emotional nourishment & much more. All these begins when a person is inside the mother’s womb & lasts untill the mother dies or indeed,it continues when she dies & become a spirit,a living dead.
Therefore it is necessary that the love,care & tenderness are all reciprocated by everyone towards his or her mother,since everyone of us has a mother. So we hear such proverbs as “A child does not laugh at the ugliness of his/her mother”. The Kenyans put their own as this, & I quote”The mother of the big he-goat has no horns’! This last proverb indicates that all the “big men” e,g,The Artists,Generals,Presidents,Bishops,doctors,Professors,Inventors,Singers, Scientist,Teachers e.t.c are all born of a woman,of a mother who may not herself be regarded as a big person in the society,she may not have”horns”,but she gives birth to a big person in the society.


                                                                                    WRITTEN BY CHINYERE NJIRIBEAKO OF WTF

 

 

Respect for our Parents/ Elders

Just like late chinua Achebe said in one of his books. Things have fallen apart and the centre can no longer hold.

Nowadays children do not respect their parents or have fear for the elders anymore. Let’s not pretend it started now, no it didn’t. It has been like this for years now but it’s a delicate issue that demands immediate attention as things are hurriedly becoming messy.
It’s no longer that way it used to be these days when we do not have to play outside the compound or play too long for without being reminded we already know when to go back to our books for the day’s book assignment or indulgence to house chores.
It’s no longer these days when we cry even when not yet beaten just because we were told by mother that we’ll be reported to father over a mistake or ill attitude. We were scared of father because his say is the final and he’ll never spare the rod to spoil the child.
When we misbehave we try so much to please our parents by being industrious, putting things in other at home. Helping in house chores and pleading with them especially mother to forgive. For if she forgives, father can easily let go.
Things are no longer like y’day when we greet our parents and elders calmly with a good tone of voice.
Our children are no longer like we of yesterday that helps the old with her/his luggage while walking past till any of us first reaches his destination.
What happpens to these children of yesterday that always keep quiet and listen when elders talk rather than talk back in a rude manner and hurl insults.
A lot of atrocities happens now that children beats their own parents. They engage in a lot of blood shedding acts that at times we wonder if we gave birth to human. They kill without mercy. Kids! You’re taken out when met in the line of duty not minding how related you are to him.
Our little girls sells their body in exchange for money and the society sees nothing wrong with it. They’re no longer helpful to their parents like it used to be. They prefer already made” life in all things. Food they eat, in education, career, even life patner.
Sometimes I wonder if it’s still in voke like before that a man tests a woman properly in different ways before, ensuring she’s a wife material before proposing to her. Now it’s like they prefer the bad to the good. Do our girls consider a man’s heart now than his pocket? I don’t think so
I used to think our parents needs a lot of work to do at home but also i found out that many did their work but children nowadays are so adamant to advice and this rotten western civilization is fast eating up our norms and culture.
We should understand that we are Africans, borrowing or working hard to adapt to a white man’s way of life will only cripple our original, ancient, peaceful, and cultural heritage and life style.
Africans! We all must go back to our original root which is enriched with values, respect, rich culture and traditions. Let our children be these children we use to be that parents are so proud to speak of at any gathering.
All hands must be on deck in making this work. Parents, put your house on check, relate with your children, give them time for that’s your first job. Raise a child the society will be so proud to have.
Elders should still be elders of yesterday who speaks truth no matter how risky it is. Correct a child going astray. For in Africa we believe a child is owned by the society not just the parents.
Children be the child you wish to have tomorrow. Strive to make a difference amongst others and make the society proud.
This is the voice of African lioness.
God bless the African Children!

 

Written by Eby Asogwa

CHANGE THEIR WORLD. CHANGE YOURS. THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.